I'm really into asian looking animals
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
