i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
