You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
