I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
