Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
i think my cat just said my name.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
