Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
