It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
