We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
