I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize