the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.