Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Okay so I just had a really great idea