he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
