Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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