K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
