Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
