she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
