Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
