great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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