Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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