She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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