i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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