So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
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Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
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There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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