idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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