I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
