1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
