I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
a search helicopter?!
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
A bitchslap is in order.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
