is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
