It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
