You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
