When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize