Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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