Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I love having hate sex.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Liz is crying about burritos again.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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