Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
