Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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