you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
