So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
