Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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