But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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