I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Randomize
