Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
