Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize