She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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