I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
