they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
