You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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