In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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