There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize