nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
