You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
my liver is dry heaving
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
