It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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