take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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